6 1/2 Ways to Live a More Contented Life

1) Ask for help

          Life is too short to spin your wheels trying to do it all on your own. If there is someone who can help, ask them. My husband and I recently wanted to BBQ but neither of us knew how and didn’t want to buy any equipment or flounder around on our own. We asked a friend who BBQs a lot and now we’re on our way to being expert outdoor cooks!

2) Simplify your life

          This can start with that spring cleaning you didn’t quite get around to. There is stuff you’ll never use, and this stuff clutters up the room that might be available for exciting new things and experiences and people to come into your life. Got anything like that????

3) Focus on the positive

          A personal pet peeve of mine…wasting time in conversation or other activities on negative things beyond our control: the weather, politics (get out and vote to make a change), inflated reports that capitalize on sensationally bad news, gossip and wallowing in the bad experiences of others…it doesn’t really help them and it certainly doesn’t help you.

4) Meditate

          Meditation is a salve that calms how our mind processes some of the crazies in life. A regular practice of meditation alleviates much of the “monkey mind” of energetic discourse that can take over, in spite of our best efforts to not let things get to us. (For an excellent guide to meditating, check out Edward Viljoen's The Power of Meditation.)

5)  Look for what's important 

          Pretend the end is near. What will you spend your last days doing and with whom? Perhaps it’s about family and friends rather than getting back at someone or stretching your resources to acquire that expensive car…or house…or outfit…or….

6 1/2) Share your wealth

          I give this one 1 ½ because it helps others and it helps you at least half as much as it helps others. When it suddenly looks like crap in my life, the best thing I can do is to do for others. It takes the focus off me and my (usually little) problem and benefits someone else. Some of the most powerful giving I have done in my life has come when I turn away from an inane issue in my life to help another.


      One contented little guy



 

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Contact Antonia at antoniasseniormoments@hotmail.com or Antonia's Senior Moments on Facebook



How Doing Nothing Can Help You Do Everything

          Once a month I have what I call a 'No Tech’ Day. During this 24-hour period, I don’t turn on my computer or my cell phone. I don’t drive my car or watch TV, Netflix or videos and I don't listen to music. I don’t text, Tweet or use my landline to reach out. I don’t microwave or do laundry. I do turn on the heater if necessary and will use electricity for lights in the evening. It’s a cathodic fasting of sorts, and it juices me up to do more and be more productive in the days that follow this break in my routine.

          What do I do if I’m not doing all that? I sit in silence, I walk, I read, I feel the sun on my body as I contemplate my garden and I meditate. I visit with friends if something is pre-arranged. I play with my cat; Kali loves these days when it seems I never stop tossing the ball or pulling the string throughout the house for her entertainment. I eat salads, and I miss having my morning coffee. But I remind myself that it’s only for 24 hours.

           Like a lot of people, I can get overwhelmed with the fast-paced world of technology that, for the most part, enhances our lives. We communicate, problem solve, create new ideas and develop systems at breakneck speed. We have trained ourselves to think on our feet, to multi-task and to make decisions on the fly instead of mulling over our reactions and responses in contemplative repose.

          At the Center for Spiritual Living, my metaphysical abode, our practice for this and next month is silence and retreat. We’ve been talking about ways to question if you’d benefit from spending time in silence and some ideas for ways to create that for yourself. If it's been forever since you've taken a whole day to be alone or if you can't go for an hour without checking e-mail, Facebook, etc., you might be prime for a 'No Tech' Day. For me, I participate daily in a snippet of silence when I meditate. On a No Tech Day, I meditate several times: upon waking and later in the day, sometimes leading to a delicious nap.
 

          One of the main rewards I get out of taking a break from a fast-paced life is being reminded how the simplicity of a quiet day enhances my appreciation of all that surrounds me without fanfare. I remember what silence sounds like, I become aware of what outside noises I live with daily, and I stop to smell the flowers both in reality and metaphorically speaking. While I’m embarrassed to say sometimes it takes one of these retreat days to get me back in touch with the simple things in life, I’d rather own up to it and gain the benefits instead of just plugging along without nurturing my soul.

          It’s pretty simple but it can be challenging if you’ve never lived without electronics for a day. You can do it. You can improve the more you do it. Don’t get discouraged. Try it for an hour at a time at first. I promise you it’ll be worth it.



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     Being Awake - Guest Blog by Randall Friesen
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leave a message at:  antoniasseniormoments@hotmail.com

Change: Can You Teach an Old Dog New Tricks?

          As a Californian, I view change the same as being in one of our frequent earthquakes where the ground underneath me shifts unpredictably. I’ve never been a big fan of change. It used to irritate me that, just when things were exactly where I wanted them, bam! Everything would change!

When it comes hard and unexpectedly...

          I also resented change when it came so hard and unexpectedly in my senior years. I laughably thought after I retired, got my house just the way I wanted it, with the best friends around me that I had cultivated over the years plus my resources, financial, in particular, were lined up, it would all stay that way. Well, remember 2008? I was newly retired after working for 40 years. Millions of people, me included, could do little but try to keep our heads above water as we watched our savings dwindle, homes and jobs were lost along with a general reduction in the quality of our lives. I finally had to concede that change happens and that it’s going to happen for the rest of our lives.

          There is change that happens to us through no action on our part and there is change that we consciously choose. When I chose to move out from my spouse, I knew things would change, and I was willing to be open to that change because I wanted it to help strengthen my relationship with him, which it did. It’s the change I didn’t choose that, over time, caught me off guard and has been the most difficult to embrace.

I've learned to buckle up and meditate

          With a lot of reflection and work over the years, however, I’ve learned to accept change and see it more and more as an opportunity to learn and grow. I don’t love it, but at least I know that something good will generally accompany any discomfort that it entails. I’ve learned to buckle up and meditate my way to the next thing change brings forth.

          As the mature adult I've grown to be (don't laugh!), I now treat change like a boo boo, and you can too. Here’s my prescription for dealing with change:

          1)  Be shocked at the change, whatever it is.